October 2023
The "S" Word, 22 October 2023
19 10 23 Filed in: Sermons | Ephesians: Our True Identity
The "S" Word
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 5:21-33
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: We are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Although my primary identity is found in Christ, I’m a citizen of the United States. I love this country. There’s a spirit of creativity, innovation, and risk-taking that has made us a world leader in business, education, science, military, and entertainment. But every strength has a weakness, and one of the negatives about our pioneering spirit is we are almost certainly the most individualistic nation in the history of the world. Rugged individualism has value, but also a huge downside. You may recall God said, “It’s not good for the man to be alone” in Genesis. Is it any wonder so many today are lonely? Cancel culture has run amok, divorce has split many families, and in our “pursuit of happiness,” we are tempted to ignore those around us.
As we continue in our series on the book of Ephesians—a letter written by Paul to a church in modern-day Turkey—we will see what is possibly the most offensive word in our individualized culture.
Before we dive in to our text, I want to remind you of the ending of Pastor Mike’s text from two weeks ago.
So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. 16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. 17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. 18 Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit, 19 singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts. 20 And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. (Ephesians 5:15-20, NLT)
This is all possible when we are filled with the Holy Spirit, controlled by the Holy Spirit, surrendered to the Holy Spirit. Now we begin.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21, NLT)
There it is! Did you see it? Submit! How does that make you feel?
The original Greek word, hupotasso (hoop-ot-as’-so) means, “to subordinate; to obey; subdue unto, submit self unto.” In other words, it means what you think it means!
Submission is not popular in our culture. It was hardly popular 2000 years ago in the midst of the Roman Empire when Paul was writing. Although racism and discrimination are very real today, we live in a nation that, at least in writing, believes “all men are created equal.” There was not such philosophy in Rome. Abuse was rampant. Women were slaves. In fact, going much farther back to the opening chapter of the Bible we read,
Then God said, “Let us make human beings in our image, to be like us. (Genesis 1:26a, NLT)
Notice the Trinity, the plural, us…one God in three persons, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. God created the first man, Adam (which means “man” in Hebrew) and woman and all was well until the Fall when Adam and Eve sinned. Hierarchy emerged after the Fall when God said to Eve,
And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16b, NLT)
Do you see the tension? Ever since, men have been trying to domineer over women (and men). Women have been striving to even the score. Humans have been trying to get others to obey, to submit. We love power and control, don’t we? Sin is so common, we often don’t even recognize it when we commit it.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21, NLT)
But notice Paul didn’t just say, “Submit!” In fact, he didn’t even say, “Submit to God.” He says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
We’re going to see how this related to marriage in a moment, but note this verse is not addressed to couples. It’s for all of us. We don’t blindly submit to one another, but in our quest to glorify God and revere Christ, we love one another and submit to one another. The Greek word for reverence, phobos, is where we get the word “phobia.” It means to be put in fear, alarm or fright, to be afraid. This doesn’t mean to avoid, but to recognize the power of, to be in awe of, to revere. We are to be in awe of Jesus, to make him LORD and Master of our lives. To fear someone or something often involves terror, causing us to run away. Fear of the LORD means awe and wonder, drawing us closer to God like the awe and wonder of the Grand Canyon. To put it simply, what you fear is your God.
For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22, NLT)
Did I see some women wince? Remember, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Yield to each other out of love. It’s not about hierarchy or power but bringing God glory in and through our relationships. One commentator says, “All it asks is that wives give up self-centeredness, take seriously their mutuality with their husbands, and promote the benefit of their husbands.”
In Paul’s day, women were considered not only inferior to men, but also impure.
For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:23-24, NLT)
Tragically, this passage has been abused by men seeking power. Ladies, this does not mean be a doormat, tolerate abuse of any kind, or engage in sinful behavior (which would not be out of reverence to Christ).
Listen to N.T. Wright on this text:
Paul assumes, as do most cultures, that there are significant differences between men and women, differences that go far beyond mere biological and reproductive function. Their relations and roles must therefore be mutually complementary, rather than identical. Equality in voting rights, and in employment opportunities and remuneration (which is still not a reality in many places), should not be taken to imply such identity. And, within marriage, the guideline is clear. The husband is to take the lead - though he is to do so fully mindful of the self-sacrificial model which the Messiah has provided. As soon as 'taking the lead' becomes bullying or arrogant, the whole thing collapses.
I fully realize Paul is not politically correct, but is our culture offering a better model for men and women? It seems that our world is plagued by broken homes, broken marriages, broken relationships…could it be that we have abandoned God’s design for family? This is not an attack on those of you who are not in healthy marriages—far from it—but I wonder if we would embrace our differences, celebrate them, and submit to one another if we wouldn’t be vastly better off.
As the church submits to Christ, so wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Tragically, this passage has been abused by men seeking power which I believe is what started the rejection of God’s design for marriage. I’ve heard so many stories of women rejecting and even hating men after suffering evil abuse. Ladies, if you find it hard to imagine submitting to a man, consider the next verse.
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her (Ephesians 5:25, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Husbands, Jesus died for the church. Are you willing to die for your wife? That’s the point. Such dedication would never make selfish demands. It would never harm or abuse. Godly husbands love sacrificially, making submission a joy.
Husbands, Jesus is to be your role model. Not Hugh Hefner or Lebron James, Neil Armstrong, Nelson Mandela, or Bear Grylls. Jesus was not married, but the church is his bride, the king’s wife. He gave us his life for her and we are to give up our lives for our wives (hey, that rhymes!).
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…unto death!
A few years ago I was speaking with one of our senior saints and asked him, “How many times have you ever played the submit card?” In other words, how many times did you take charge, telling your wife to obey? He paused and said, “Zero!”
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Paul elaborates:
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28
(Ephesians 5:25-27, NLT)
This is a beautiful vision of what Jesus has done for us, the church. Hallelujah!
In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. 29 No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. 30 And we are members of his body. (Ephesians 5:28-30, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
One of my favorite passages to read at wedding says,
Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. (Philippians 2:3, NLT)
This isn’t rocket science. Jesus summarized the entire Bible in two commands: love God and love your neighbor (or spouse) as yourself. You take care of your body. You eat. You bathe. You see a doctor when you’re in pain. Imagine what would happen if spouses cared for one another like they care for themselves. Of course, this need not be restricted to marriages. This verse applies to all of us, a brilliant vision of life together. Warren Wiersbe notes,
When the Christian wife submits herself to Christ and lets Him be the Lord of her life, she will have no difficulty submitting to her husband. This does not mean that she becomes a slave, for the husband is also to submit to Christ. And if both are living under the lordship of Christ, there can be only harmony. Headship is not dictatorship. “Each for the other, both for the Lord.” The Christian husband and wife should pray together and spend time in the Word, so that they might know God’s will for their individual lives and for their home. Most of the marital conflicts I have dealt with as a pastor have stemmed from failure of the husband and/or wife to submit to Christ, spend time in His Word, and seek to do His will each day.
To conclude, Paul goes all the way back to Genesis 2:24:
As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” 32 This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. (Ephesians 5:31-32, NLT)
There’s two things going on simultaneously here. Do you see it? A husband and wife are united into one. This is true of Jesus and his bride, the Church.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Family, I’ve seen two extremes. I’ve seen men rule over their wives which is clearly not submission. I’ve also seen men afraid to exercise servant leadership, so passive that they become doormats.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
God’s design for marriage is a man and woman complement one another…different yet equal. We don’t need to embrace societal stereotypes that say the man does the outdoor work and the woman does the inside work…unless that’s what is agreed upon mutually. I’ve heard some preachers say the women must stay home with the kids while the man brings home a paycheck…but I’ve seen healthy examples where the roles are reversed…if that’s what is agreed upon mutually. Obviously our economy makes it challenging—but not impossible—to live on one income. But you need to find what works for your marriage.
As a simple example, we decided early in our marriage that whoever cooks, the other cleans. For 33 years I do dishes about 360 days a year! Some men love to cook, which is great. Do what works for you. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. It’s worth noting the man is to love his wife and the woman is to respect her husband. For further reading on this, see loveandrespect.com (not necessarily an endorsement!). I believe the overarching point is men and women are different…by design.
A husband must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I’m sure this is how Adam and Eve originally behaved before the Fall. We need the Holy Spirit to make us like Jesus, filled with sacrificial, agape love for one another. When we love or respect one another, it fuels the spouse to reciprocate. Tragically, when one is not loved or respected, it can short-circuit the relationship. In other words, when a wife shows respect to her husband, he is more likely to respond with love and vice versa. The challenge when you’re stuck is who goes first?
Honor Marriages
Celebrate Singles
Jesus was single. Paul said it’s better to not marry.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ in love.
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 5:21-33
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: We are to submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Although my primary identity is found in Christ, I’m a citizen of the United States. I love this country. There’s a spirit of creativity, innovation, and risk-taking that has made us a world leader in business, education, science, military, and entertainment. But every strength has a weakness, and one of the negatives about our pioneering spirit is we are almost certainly the most individualistic nation in the history of the world. Rugged individualism has value, but also a huge downside. You may recall God said, “It’s not good for the man to be alone” in Genesis. Is it any wonder so many today are lonely? Cancel culture has run amok, divorce has split many families, and in our “pursuit of happiness,” we are tempted to ignore those around us.
As we continue in our series on the book of Ephesians—a letter written by Paul to a church in modern-day Turkey—we will see what is possibly the most offensive word in our individualized culture.
Before we dive in to our text, I want to remind you of the ending of Pastor Mike’s text from two weeks ago.
So be careful how you live. Don’t live like fools, but like those who are wise. 16 Make the most of every opportunity in these evil days. 17 Don’t act thoughtlessly, but understand what the Lord wants you to do. 18 Don’t be drunk with wine, because that will ruin your life. Instead, be filled with the Holy Spirit, 19 singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs among yourselves, and making music to the Lord in your hearts. 20 And give thanks for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. (Ephesians 5:15-20, NLT)
This is all possible when we are filled with the Holy Spirit, controlled by the Holy Spirit, surrendered to the Holy Spirit. Now we begin.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21, NLT)
There it is! Did you see it? Submit! How does that make you feel?
The original Greek word, hupotasso (hoop-ot-as’-so) means, “to subordinate; to obey; subdue unto, submit self unto.” In other words, it means what you think it means!
Submission is not popular in our culture. It was hardly popular 2000 years ago in the midst of the Roman Empire when Paul was writing. Although racism and discrimination are very real today, we live in a nation that, at least in writing, believes “all men are created equal.” There was not such philosophy in Rome. Abuse was rampant. Women were slaves. In fact, going much farther back to the opening chapter of the Bible we read,
Then God said, “Let us make human beings in our image, to be like us. (Genesis 1:26a, NLT)
Notice the Trinity, the plural, us…one God in three persons, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. God created the first man, Adam (which means “man” in Hebrew) and woman and all was well until the Fall when Adam and Eve sinned. Hierarchy emerged after the Fall when God said to Eve,
And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you.” (Genesis 3:16b, NLT)
Do you see the tension? Ever since, men have been trying to domineer over women (and men). Women have been striving to even the score. Humans have been trying to get others to obey, to submit. We love power and control, don’t we? Sin is so common, we often don’t even recognize it when we commit it.
And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. (Ephesians 5:21, NLT)
But notice Paul didn’t just say, “Submit!” In fact, he didn’t even say, “Submit to God.” He says, “Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.”
We’re going to see how this related to marriage in a moment, but note this verse is not addressed to couples. It’s for all of us. We don’t blindly submit to one another, but in our quest to glorify God and revere Christ, we love one another and submit to one another. The Greek word for reverence, phobos, is where we get the word “phobia.” It means to be put in fear, alarm or fright, to be afraid. This doesn’t mean to avoid, but to recognize the power of, to be in awe of, to revere. We are to be in awe of Jesus, to make him LORD and Master of our lives. To fear someone or something often involves terror, causing us to run away. Fear of the LORD means awe and wonder, drawing us closer to God like the awe and wonder of the Grand Canyon. To put it simply, what you fear is your God.
For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22, NLT)
Did I see some women wince? Remember, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Yield to each other out of love. It’s not about hierarchy or power but bringing God glory in and through our relationships. One commentator says, “All it asks is that wives give up self-centeredness, take seriously their mutuality with their husbands, and promote the benefit of their husbands.”
In Paul’s day, women were considered not only inferior to men, but also impure.
For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything. (Ephesians 5:23-24, NLT)
Tragically, this passage has been abused by men seeking power. Ladies, this does not mean be a doormat, tolerate abuse of any kind, or engage in sinful behavior (which would not be out of reverence to Christ).
Listen to N.T. Wright on this text:
Paul assumes, as do most cultures, that there are significant differences between men and women, differences that go far beyond mere biological and reproductive function. Their relations and roles must therefore be mutually complementary, rather than identical. Equality in voting rights, and in employment opportunities and remuneration (which is still not a reality in many places), should not be taken to imply such identity. And, within marriage, the guideline is clear. The husband is to take the lead - though he is to do so fully mindful of the self-sacrificial model which the Messiah has provided. As soon as 'taking the lead' becomes bullying or arrogant, the whole thing collapses.
I fully realize Paul is not politically correct, but is our culture offering a better model for men and women? It seems that our world is plagued by broken homes, broken marriages, broken relationships…could it be that we have abandoned God’s design for family? This is not an attack on those of you who are not in healthy marriages—far from it—but I wonder if we would embrace our differences, celebrate them, and submit to one another if we wouldn’t be vastly better off.
As the church submits to Christ, so wives should submit to their husbands in everything.
Tragically, this passage has been abused by men seeking power which I believe is what started the rejection of God’s design for marriage. I’ve heard so many stories of women rejecting and even hating men after suffering evil abuse. Ladies, if you find it hard to imagine submitting to a man, consider the next verse.
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her (Ephesians 5:25, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Husbands, Jesus died for the church. Are you willing to die for your wife? That’s the point. Such dedication would never make selfish demands. It would never harm or abuse. Godly husbands love sacrificially, making submission a joy.
Husbands, Jesus is to be your role model. Not Hugh Hefner or Lebron James, Neil Armstrong, Nelson Mandela, or Bear Grylls. Jesus was not married, but the church is his bride, the king’s wife. He gave us his life for her and we are to give up our lives for our wives (hey, that rhymes!).
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…unto death!
A few years ago I was speaking with one of our senior saints and asked him, “How many times have you ever played the submit card?” In other words, how many times did you take charge, telling your wife to obey? He paused and said, “Zero!”
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. Paul elaborates:
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her 26 to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. 27 He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. 28
(Ephesians 5:25-27, NLT)
This is a beautiful vision of what Jesus has done for us, the church. Hallelujah!
In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. 29 No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. 30 And we are members of his body. (Ephesians 5:28-30, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
One of my favorite passages to read at wedding says,
Don’t be selfish; don’t try to impress others. Be humble, thinking of others as better than yourselves. (Philippians 2:3, NLT)
This isn’t rocket science. Jesus summarized the entire Bible in two commands: love God and love your neighbor (or spouse) as yourself. You take care of your body. You eat. You bathe. You see a doctor when you’re in pain. Imagine what would happen if spouses cared for one another like they care for themselves. Of course, this need not be restricted to marriages. This verse applies to all of us, a brilliant vision of life together. Warren Wiersbe notes,
When the Christian wife submits herself to Christ and lets Him be the Lord of her life, she will have no difficulty submitting to her husband. This does not mean that she becomes a slave, for the husband is also to submit to Christ. And if both are living under the lordship of Christ, there can be only harmony. Headship is not dictatorship. “Each for the other, both for the Lord.” The Christian husband and wife should pray together and spend time in the Word, so that they might know God’s will for their individual lives and for their home. Most of the marital conflicts I have dealt with as a pastor have stemmed from failure of the husband and/or wife to submit to Christ, spend time in His Word, and seek to do His will each day.
To conclude, Paul goes all the way back to Genesis 2:24:
As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” 32 This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. (Ephesians 5:31-32, NLT)
There’s two things going on simultaneously here. Do you see it? A husband and wife are united into one. This is true of Jesus and his bride, the Church.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
Family, I’ve seen two extremes. I’ve seen men rule over their wives which is clearly not submission. I’ve also seen men afraid to exercise servant leadership, so passive that they become doormats.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
God’s design for marriage is a man and woman complement one another…different yet equal. We don’t need to embrace societal stereotypes that say the man does the outdoor work and the woman does the inside work…unless that’s what is agreed upon mutually. I’ve heard some preachers say the women must stay home with the kids while the man brings home a paycheck…but I’ve seen healthy examples where the roles are reversed…if that’s what is agreed upon mutually. Obviously our economy makes it challenging—but not impossible—to live on one income. But you need to find what works for your marriage.
As a simple example, we decided early in our marriage that whoever cooks, the other cleans. For 33 years I do dishes about 360 days a year! Some men love to cook, which is great. Do what works for you. Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.
So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband. (Ephesians 5:33, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. It’s worth noting the man is to love his wife and the woman is to respect her husband. For further reading on this, see loveandrespect.com (not necessarily an endorsement!). I believe the overarching point is men and women are different…by design.
A husband must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ. I’m sure this is how Adam and Eve originally behaved before the Fall. We need the Holy Spirit to make us like Jesus, filled with sacrificial, agape love for one another. When we love or respect one another, it fuels the spouse to reciprocate. Tragically, when one is not loved or respected, it can short-circuit the relationship. In other words, when a wife shows respect to her husband, he is more likely to respond with love and vice versa. The challenge when you’re stuck is who goes first?
Honor Marriages
Celebrate Singles
Jesus was single. Paul said it’s better to not marry.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud 5 or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. 6 It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. 7 Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7, NLT)
Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ in love.
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.
One, 17 September 2023
04 10 23 Filed in: Sermons | Ephesians: Our True Identity
One
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 4:1-16
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: The Church of Jesus Christ is to be one family, united not in our politics, ethnicity, age, or income but in faith, all loving and serving together for God’s glory.
One of the six core values of First Alliance Church states,
Family. We are a mosaic of people loving God and doing life together. (1 Corinthians 12:4-31; Romans 12:10; Revelation 7:9)
I love mosaics. The don’t usually look all that great up close. In fact, most individual pieces are anything but attractive, typically broken glass fragments. When an artist is able to bring together a variety of shards of glass, the results can be stunning.
We’re in the middle of series on the book of Ephesians, finding our true identity. Whether it’s due to Hollywood, social media, our families of origin, or the expectations of ourselves or others, it’s easy to be confused about our identity. Who are we? Whose are we? Why are we? Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus in modern day Turkey addresses these questions, and today’s text in chapter four is packed with compelling instructions on what it means to be a part of the Body of Christ, the family of God, the Church…a mosaic of people loving God and doing life together.
What’s the first thing you think of when I say the word family? Is it positive or negative? We’ve all seen various families portrayed on tv and the movies, whether positively or negatively. What are some famous families?
Regardless of your own family of origin, it’s possible to imagine some of those ideal families, whether they’re realistic or not.
My personal experience with family is quite positive, but I must admit there are no perfect families, and even the best of them can be complicated and messy. Where two or more are gathered together…there’s the potential for conflict! The very thing that makes relationships interesting—diversity—is also the source of our tensions. How boring would it be if we all looked, dressed, voted, and behaved the same? Yet many of us have been taught to question or even hate those who are different.
God created you unique and special, with dignity, value and worth. He knew you in your mother’s womb and He sees you, He hears you, He loves you. I believe somebody needs to hear that today!
We all have a lot in common, yet we’re all different. Our theme today is one…unity…not uniformity, but unity. It wasn’t long ago that I heard unity and diversity are the two words that form the word university…a place where different people and opinions can come together (though that’s not always the case!).
As we noted three weeks ago, there was a huge divide between Jews and Gentiles which Jesus died to remove, unifying them into one family. We are one in Christ. It’s a spiritual reality we need to guard and protect. It’s also fragile which is why unity is one of the four prayers I pray regularly for First Alliance Church (echoing the prayer Jesus prayed for us in John 17).
Are you ready to dive in?
Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. (Ephesians 4:1)
What’s the therefore there for? The first three chapters of the book are about doctrine, right beliefs, orthodoxy. The second half of the book is about duty, about right actions, orthopraxy. It’s not enough to know the right things if you can’t apply them. Our enemy, satan, knows the truth. He believes in Jesus and saw him before and after the resurrection. He probably knows the Bible better than you or I.
We’ve been invited into God’s family. If you receive the invitation, you become an adopted son or daughter of the Creator of the Universe. The King of kings. The LORD of all. Paul says if this is true, if you are now royalty, if you are on God’s team, act like it! Lead a life worthy of your calling. Our faith cannot stop with our head. It needs to transform our hearts and hands, too.
I get so frustrated when people claim the name of Jesus but act nothing like him. Christian means “little Christ.” So what does that look like?
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. (Ephesians 4:2)
I didn’t say this was easy! Always be humble and gentle. Has anyone mastered this? I. haven’t!
Before we go any farther, let me remind you that this behavior is not the result of trying harder. It’s about surrender and letting the Holy Spirit take over. This may look like daily times of Bible study, prayer, silence, reflection, and simply saying, “Holy Spirit, take control.”
I’ll be the first to admit I don’t like slow and quiet. I like to go, produce, succeed, get ‘er done! Sabbatical interrupted my rhythms…and lowered my speed! When I get busy and excited, I find it harder to be humble and gentle. I want people to notice me and my accomplishments, and I’m tempted to tell everyone how right I am about everything! This may be fine if I’m alone, but as soon as I’m with another person…
This is why Paul says to be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your…love. Because of God’s love in you. Again, it’s not about trying harder. It’s about being filled with the Holy Spirit, emptying ourselves of our pride, selfishness, and sin and being open to God working in and through us.
If we could master this one verse, it would only be a matter of time before our campus would be overflowing with people. Humble and gentle? Patient? Who does this? Jesus followers.
Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. (Ephesians 4:3)
United. Unity. One. That’s the result of being filled with the Holy Spirit.
For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. (Ephesians 4:4)
One. That’s our theme today. Many broken pieces of glass together form one beautiful mosaic. Many parts form one body. Jesus prayed in John 17 that we would be one. Again, not uniformity, but unity.
I’ve told the story before, but on my wedding day, I was excited to watch my beautiful bride walk down the aisle to meet her groom (me!). If the same woman came down the aisle in pieces (eyeballs rolling, foot hopping, hands wiggling), it would’ve been horrifying! Same parts, just not one. The biblical vision of the Church of Jesus Christ is one body of diverse parts joined together not by our politics or skin color or favorite football team, but rather by the LORD.
There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism,
6 one God and Father of all,
who is over all, in all, and living through all. (Ephesians 4:5-6)
I like to say we’re all related by blood…the blood of Jesus. Likewise, we’re all equal at the foot of the cross. We all need Jesus.
However, he has given each one of us a special gift through the generosity of Christ. That is why the Scriptures say,
“When he ascended to the heights,
he led a crowd of captives
and gave gifts to his people.” (Ephesians 4:7-8)
This is a quote from Psalm 68 and likely referring to Jesus’ victory through his death and resurrection, setting us free from the law of sin and death. We’ll get to the gifts in a moment.
Notice that it says “he ascended.” This clearly means that Christ also descended to our lowly world. 10 And the same one who descended is the one who ascended higher than all the heavens, so that he might fill the entire universe with himself. (Ephesians 4:9-10)
Jesus descended from heaven to earth about 2000 years ago, ascended into heaven and promised to return…soon! In the meantime, the Holy Spirit came (and you can read about that in Acts 2) and is alive in our world today, living in every believer, though many seem unaware of His presence and the command to be continually filled with the Holy Spirit, continually surrendering our will and desires and pursuing His. Jesus’ mission is to rule over everything. He is King of kings and LORD of lords.
Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. (Ephesians 4:11)
Some have called this the fivefold ministry, though others see pastors and teachers combined. A frequent acronym is APEST: apostle, prophet, evangelist, shepherd or pastor, and teacher. Let’s look at these gifts.
In the New Testament, the Apostles were a special group of people who spent time with Jesus. Obviously, none of them exist today, but apostles (small a) are sent ones, entrepreneurs and church planters that think about new ways to reach new people with the good news of the gospel.
Prophets are not necessarily future tellers, but forth tellers. They know God’s will and bring correction and challenge, questioning the status quo. Biblical prophets were generally not popular, and not much is different today!
Evangelists recruit, communicate good news, and introduce people to Jesus.
Shepherds or pastors care for people, protecting the flocks and leading others toward maturity.
Teachers teach! They communicate God’s truth.
In our culture, professional Christians who may fall into one or more of these categories are typically given the title pastor or reverend or clergy, which kind of defeats the distinction of the fivefold gifting of APEST, of church leaders. Why are the gifts given?
Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. (Ephesians 4:12)
Their responsibility is not to do the ministry, but to equip God’s people to do the ministry. Do you see this? One of the most important things I want you to understand is you are called by God to be a minister, a disciple-maker. It’s not just for professional Christians! Ministry is acts of service to bring glory to God, which could be plumbing, lawn care, factory work, whatever…it can all be done for God’s glory. When Paul was writing, there weren’t paid and unpaid Christians. There were leaders and followers. One of the greatest strategies of our enemy is to make people think only the clergy can do ministry. That’s wiping out 99% of the army of God!
Imagine if a football team thought the job of the coach was to play on the field while the players sat back and watched! Do you think any football coach by himself or herself could beat an entire football team? Of course not! It’s the job of the coach to equip the team to win the game. Likewise, it’s my job and the job of our staff to recruit and equip you to win the game, to make disciples, to launch Life Groups, to serve the poor, to disciple our children and youth, to lead worship, to care for our physical campus, to manage the finances, to lead people to Jesus, and all of the other things involved in restoring God’s masterpieces.
This idea is known as the priesthood of all believers, and a few years ago one of our elders at the time, Doug Oliver, alerted me to the reason it’s such a challenge. As you may know, the King James Version of the Bible has been influential since its translation in 1611. It says
And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; 12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: (Ephesians 4:11-12, KJV)
It says it’s the job of the pastors and clergy to do the work of the ministry. It was corrected in the New King James Version which states:
And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, (Ephesians 4:11-12, NKJV)
It’s the difference between a semicolon and a comma, and it makes a huge difference! If I had to do all of the work of the ministry, I would burn out like so many clergy have done in recent days. If our job as staff is to equip you (which we do through Sunday gatherings, Life Groups, online resources, discipleship Huddles, Right Now Media, and other tools), we can all get in the game, loving God, loving our neighbors as ourselves, and making disciples of all nations. Let me say it again, you are called by God to be a minister, a disciple-maker. First Alliance isn’t about a Sunday gathering. It’s about an army of love getting equipped to be Jesus with skin on 168 hours a week.
It's worth noting there are other parts of the New Testament which speak about spiritual gifts such as healing, hospitality, and tongues, but in this case Paul mentions people…people to equip the body.
13 This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ. (Ephesians 4:13)
There it is again. Unity…in Christ.
Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. 15 Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. 16 He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. (Ephesians 4:14-16)
I could preach another sermon just on those verses, but here’s the big idea:
The Church of Jesus Christ is to be one family, united not in our politics, ethnicity, age, or income but in faith, all loving and serving together for God’s glory.
We’re different. We need one another. We need apostles like Will Henderson to start new churches like LEAD Community Church. We need prophets like Jason Horton to challenge us and make us uncomfortable through the proclamation of God’s Word. We need evangelists like Hollywood to share the good news of Jesus with people who are not yet following Christ. We need pastors and shepherds like Pastor Donald and his wife, Joyce, who can visit the sick, care for the needy, and love on people. We need teachers like Pastor Mike and the others on our teaching team to instruct us in the Bible and show us what it means to follow Jesus.
Paul is talking about the rule of Jesus over everything, and to do so he has given the church leaders to equip his people to serve and glorify him and make him known everywhere, all the time, not just in a building on Sunday morning.
We’re all different…by design. That can be challenging, at times, which is why Paul began by saying,
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. (Ephesians 4:2)
Family, let’s surrender to the LORD, allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through each of us as we restore God’s masterpieces in Toledo and beyond for His glory. He is worthy of our worship, our praise, our time, our talents, and our treasures. Amen!
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 4:1-16
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: The Church of Jesus Christ is to be one family, united not in our politics, ethnicity, age, or income but in faith, all loving and serving together for God’s glory.
One of the six core values of First Alliance Church states,
Family. We are a mosaic of people loving God and doing life together. (1 Corinthians 12:4-31; Romans 12:10; Revelation 7:9)
I love mosaics. The don’t usually look all that great up close. In fact, most individual pieces are anything but attractive, typically broken glass fragments. When an artist is able to bring together a variety of shards of glass, the results can be stunning.
We’re in the middle of series on the book of Ephesians, finding our true identity. Whether it’s due to Hollywood, social media, our families of origin, or the expectations of ourselves or others, it’s easy to be confused about our identity. Who are we? Whose are we? Why are we? Paul’s letter to the church in Ephesus in modern day Turkey addresses these questions, and today’s text in chapter four is packed with compelling instructions on what it means to be a part of the Body of Christ, the family of God, the Church…a mosaic of people loving God and doing life together.
What’s the first thing you think of when I say the word family? Is it positive or negative? We’ve all seen various families portrayed on tv and the movies, whether positively or negatively. What are some famous families?
Regardless of your own family of origin, it’s possible to imagine some of those ideal families, whether they’re realistic or not.
My personal experience with family is quite positive, but I must admit there are no perfect families, and even the best of them can be complicated and messy. Where two or more are gathered together…there’s the potential for conflict! The very thing that makes relationships interesting—diversity—is also the source of our tensions. How boring would it be if we all looked, dressed, voted, and behaved the same? Yet many of us have been taught to question or even hate those who are different.
God created you unique and special, with dignity, value and worth. He knew you in your mother’s womb and He sees you, He hears you, He loves you. I believe somebody needs to hear that today!
We all have a lot in common, yet we’re all different. Our theme today is one…unity…not uniformity, but unity. It wasn’t long ago that I heard unity and diversity are the two words that form the word university…a place where different people and opinions can come together (though that’s not always the case!).
As we noted three weeks ago, there was a huge divide between Jews and Gentiles which Jesus died to remove, unifying them into one family. We are one in Christ. It’s a spiritual reality we need to guard and protect. It’s also fragile which is why unity is one of the four prayers I pray regularly for First Alliance Church (echoing the prayer Jesus prayed for us in John 17).
Are you ready to dive in?
Therefore I, a prisoner for serving the Lord, beg you to lead a life worthy of your calling, for you have been called by God. (Ephesians 4:1)
What’s the therefore there for? The first three chapters of the book are about doctrine, right beliefs, orthodoxy. The second half of the book is about duty, about right actions, orthopraxy. It’s not enough to know the right things if you can’t apply them. Our enemy, satan, knows the truth. He believes in Jesus and saw him before and after the resurrection. He probably knows the Bible better than you or I.
We’ve been invited into God’s family. If you receive the invitation, you become an adopted son or daughter of the Creator of the Universe. The King of kings. The LORD of all. Paul says if this is true, if you are now royalty, if you are on God’s team, act like it! Lead a life worthy of your calling. Our faith cannot stop with our head. It needs to transform our hearts and hands, too.
I get so frustrated when people claim the name of Jesus but act nothing like him. Christian means “little Christ.” So what does that look like?
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. (Ephesians 4:2)
I didn’t say this was easy! Always be humble and gentle. Has anyone mastered this? I. haven’t!
Before we go any farther, let me remind you that this behavior is not the result of trying harder. It’s about surrender and letting the Holy Spirit take over. This may look like daily times of Bible study, prayer, silence, reflection, and simply saying, “Holy Spirit, take control.”
I’ll be the first to admit I don’t like slow and quiet. I like to go, produce, succeed, get ‘er done! Sabbatical interrupted my rhythms…and lowered my speed! When I get busy and excited, I find it harder to be humble and gentle. I want people to notice me and my accomplishments, and I’m tempted to tell everyone how right I am about everything! This may be fine if I’m alone, but as soon as I’m with another person…
This is why Paul says to be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your…love. Because of God’s love in you. Again, it’s not about trying harder. It’s about being filled with the Holy Spirit, emptying ourselves of our pride, selfishness, and sin and being open to God working in and through us.
If we could master this one verse, it would only be a matter of time before our campus would be overflowing with people. Humble and gentle? Patient? Who does this? Jesus followers.
Make every effort to keep yourselves united in the Spirit, binding yourselves together with peace. (Ephesians 4:3)
United. Unity. One. That’s the result of being filled with the Holy Spirit.
For there is one body and one Spirit, just as you have been called to one glorious hope for the future. (Ephesians 4:4)
One. That’s our theme today. Many broken pieces of glass together form one beautiful mosaic. Many parts form one body. Jesus prayed in John 17 that we would be one. Again, not uniformity, but unity.
I’ve told the story before, but on my wedding day, I was excited to watch my beautiful bride walk down the aisle to meet her groom (me!). If the same woman came down the aisle in pieces (eyeballs rolling, foot hopping, hands wiggling), it would’ve been horrifying! Same parts, just not one. The biblical vision of the Church of Jesus Christ is one body of diverse parts joined together not by our politics or skin color or favorite football team, but rather by the LORD.
There is one Lord, one faith, one baptism,
6 one God and Father of all,
who is over all, in all, and living through all. (Ephesians 4:5-6)
I like to say we’re all related by blood…the blood of Jesus. Likewise, we’re all equal at the foot of the cross. We all need Jesus.
However, he has given each one of us a special gift through the generosity of Christ. That is why the Scriptures say,
“When he ascended to the heights,
he led a crowd of captives
and gave gifts to his people.” (Ephesians 4:7-8)
This is a quote from Psalm 68 and likely referring to Jesus’ victory through his death and resurrection, setting us free from the law of sin and death. We’ll get to the gifts in a moment.
Notice that it says “he ascended.” This clearly means that Christ also descended to our lowly world. 10 And the same one who descended is the one who ascended higher than all the heavens, so that he might fill the entire universe with himself. (Ephesians 4:9-10)
Jesus descended from heaven to earth about 2000 years ago, ascended into heaven and promised to return…soon! In the meantime, the Holy Spirit came (and you can read about that in Acts 2) and is alive in our world today, living in every believer, though many seem unaware of His presence and the command to be continually filled with the Holy Spirit, continually surrendering our will and desires and pursuing His. Jesus’ mission is to rule over everything. He is King of kings and LORD of lords.
Now these are the gifts Christ gave to the church: the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, and the pastors and teachers. (Ephesians 4:11)
Some have called this the fivefold ministry, though others see pastors and teachers combined. A frequent acronym is APEST: apostle, prophet, evangelist, shepherd or pastor, and teacher. Let’s look at these gifts.
In the New Testament, the Apostles were a special group of people who spent time with Jesus. Obviously, none of them exist today, but apostles (small a) are sent ones, entrepreneurs and church planters that think about new ways to reach new people with the good news of the gospel.
Prophets are not necessarily future tellers, but forth tellers. They know God’s will and bring correction and challenge, questioning the status quo. Biblical prophets were generally not popular, and not much is different today!
Evangelists recruit, communicate good news, and introduce people to Jesus.
Shepherds or pastors care for people, protecting the flocks and leading others toward maturity.
Teachers teach! They communicate God’s truth.
In our culture, professional Christians who may fall into one or more of these categories are typically given the title pastor or reverend or clergy, which kind of defeats the distinction of the fivefold gifting of APEST, of church leaders. Why are the gifts given?
Their responsibility is to equip God’s people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ. (Ephesians 4:12)
Their responsibility is not to do the ministry, but to equip God’s people to do the ministry. Do you see this? One of the most important things I want you to understand is you are called by God to be a minister, a disciple-maker. It’s not just for professional Christians! Ministry is acts of service to bring glory to God, which could be plumbing, lawn care, factory work, whatever…it can all be done for God’s glory. When Paul was writing, there weren’t paid and unpaid Christians. There were leaders and followers. One of the greatest strategies of our enemy is to make people think only the clergy can do ministry. That’s wiping out 99% of the army of God!
Imagine if a football team thought the job of the coach was to play on the field while the players sat back and watched! Do you think any football coach by himself or herself could beat an entire football team? Of course not! It’s the job of the coach to equip the team to win the game. Likewise, it’s my job and the job of our staff to recruit and equip you to win the game, to make disciples, to launch Life Groups, to serve the poor, to disciple our children and youth, to lead worship, to care for our physical campus, to manage the finances, to lead people to Jesus, and all of the other things involved in restoring God’s masterpieces.
This idea is known as the priesthood of all believers, and a few years ago one of our elders at the time, Doug Oliver, alerted me to the reason it’s such a challenge. As you may know, the King James Version of the Bible has been influential since its translation in 1611. It says
And he gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; 12 For the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ: (Ephesians 4:11-12, KJV)
It says it’s the job of the pastors and clergy to do the work of the ministry. It was corrected in the New King James Version which states:
And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, 12 for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, (Ephesians 4:11-12, NKJV)
It’s the difference between a semicolon and a comma, and it makes a huge difference! If I had to do all of the work of the ministry, I would burn out like so many clergy have done in recent days. If our job as staff is to equip you (which we do through Sunday gatherings, Life Groups, online resources, discipleship Huddles, Right Now Media, and other tools), we can all get in the game, loving God, loving our neighbors as ourselves, and making disciples of all nations. Let me say it again, you are called by God to be a minister, a disciple-maker. First Alliance isn’t about a Sunday gathering. It’s about an army of love getting equipped to be Jesus with skin on 168 hours a week.
It's worth noting there are other parts of the New Testament which speak about spiritual gifts such as healing, hospitality, and tongues, but in this case Paul mentions people…people to equip the body.
13 This will continue until we all come to such unity in our faith and knowledge of God’s Son that we will be mature in the Lord, measuring up to the full and complete standard of Christ. (Ephesians 4:13)
There it is again. Unity…in Christ.
Then we will no longer be immature like children. We won’t be tossed and blown about by every wind of new teaching. We will not be influenced when people try to trick us with lies so clever they sound like the truth. 15 Instead, we will speak the truth in love, growing in every way more and more like Christ, who is the head of his body, the church. 16 He makes the whole body fit together perfectly. As each part does its own special work, it helps the other parts grow, so that the whole body is healthy and growing and full of love. (Ephesians 4:14-16)
I could preach another sermon just on those verses, but here’s the big idea:
The Church of Jesus Christ is to be one family, united not in our politics, ethnicity, age, or income but in faith, all loving and serving together for God’s glory.
We’re different. We need one another. We need apostles like Will Henderson to start new churches like LEAD Community Church. We need prophets like Jason Horton to challenge us and make us uncomfortable through the proclamation of God’s Word. We need evangelists like Hollywood to share the good news of Jesus with people who are not yet following Christ. We need pastors and shepherds like Pastor Donald and his wife, Joyce, who can visit the sick, care for the needy, and love on people. We need teachers like Pastor Mike and the others on our teaching team to instruct us in the Bible and show us what it means to follow Jesus.
Paul is talking about the rule of Jesus over everything, and to do so he has given the church leaders to equip his people to serve and glorify him and make him known everywhere, all the time, not just in a building on Sunday morning.
We’re all different…by design. That can be challenging, at times, which is why Paul began by saying,
Always be humble and gentle. Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love. (Ephesians 4:2)
Family, let’s surrender to the LORD, allowing the Holy Spirit to work in and through each of us as we restore God’s masterpieces in Toledo and beyond for His glory. He is worthy of our worship, our praise, our time, our talents, and our treasures. Amen!
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.
How to Live, 1 October 2023
02 10 23 Filed in: Sermons | Ephesians: Our True Identity
How to Live
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 4:29-32
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: Life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
Who are you?
We’ve been going verse-by-verse through the book of Ephesians, a letter sent to a church in modern day Turkey that reveals our true identity…in Christ! Tragically, many draw their identity from their job, politics, education, net worth, sexual orientation, friends, addiction, worst mistake, or even family. Those things contribute to who we are, but our primary identity should come from being in Christ. Thirteen times in the NIV translation of Ephesians, the phrase “in Christ” is used. Paul used the idea more than 200 times in his writings. Do you know what those two words mean? One pastor wrote,
“As Christians, we live from our identity, not for our identity. We are defined by who we are in Christ, not what we do or fail to do for Christ. Christ defines who we are by who he is and what he’s done for us, in us, and through us. Understanding this information is the key to your transformation.”
We are in Christ or in idolatry…anything that takes a higher priority. I’m saying all of this as an introduction because we’re about to read some challenging words which we cannot follow, at least not on our own. We need a higher power. We need God…because life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
Don’t use foul or abusive language. (Ephesians 4:29a, NLT)
What does this really mean? The New International Version translates it this way:
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, (Ephesians 4:29a, NIV)
Foul language. Abusive language. Unwholesome talk. The entertainment industry has assembled a list of words that it deems inappropriate, at least for children. They can change a G-rated movie into a PG, PG-13, or even an R just by those words alone.
When our kids were younger, we had some good conversations about language. Why are some words acceptable and others not? Are “Christian swear words” ok? Is it really such a big deal when everyone is saying it? How did some words that even appear in the Bible become profanity?
The issue isn’t so much the articulation of one word or another. It’s about the meaning of the words. A word in one culture may have a different meaning in another. I infamously used a word in a sermon years ago with multiple meanings, one of which was unsuitable for a sermon…or any other usage! I had no idea and went on an apology tour the next week!
In college, I went on a trip to England where I used a particular word which I was told meant something quite different across the pond than it does in the USA!
The thing about language is it’s a communication tool. What are you communicating? What do you intend to communicate? What is in your heart…and will it be received that way? The verse continues…
Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (Ephesians 4:29b)
My parents used to say, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” I think that’s generally good advice, and the point Paul is making to this church. Let every word that comes out of your mouth be good, helpful, and encouraging. The message isn’t simply, “Don’t cuss.” It means don’t gossip. Don’t be unnecessarily critical. Or as we used to joke in youth group, “Edify, stupid!”
That was only a joke, but that reminds me of something my dad used to tell me all the time when I got in trouble: it’s not what you said, it’s how you said it. Some researchers believe 60-70 percent of human communication is non-verbal…loudness, pitch, style, tone…to say nothing of eye contact, gestures, and body language. There’s a huge difference between a child (sweetly) saying, “I’m sorry” and (yelling) “I’m sorry!!!”
Human speech can communicate virtually any emotion, and be constructive or destructive in the process. Do you remember the old line, “Sticks and stones will break my bones but…words will never hurt me”? What a lie! Words can be devastatingly toxic…or they can transform a life for the good.
I imagine most of you can recall something said many years ago that was encouraging or destructive. Maybe it was a parent, teacher, or friend. To this day, my mom still offers encouraging words to me, while others I know never knew such positivity, struggling to even believe they are loved…by God or anyone else.
Jesus literally got to the heart of the matter in one of his famous interactions with the religious Pharisees.
You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. (Matthew 12:34, ESV)
Let’s take a look at a bit of the context:
“A tree is identified by its fruit. If a tree is good, its fruit will be good. If a tree is bad, its fruit will be bad. 34 You brood of snakes! How could evil men like you speak what is good and right? For whatever is in your heart determines what you say. 35 A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. 36 And I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak. 37 The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you.” (Matthew 12:33-37, NLT)
Words are powerful. They convey meaning. Communication is built through them. Yet today, it seems harder and harder to find words that are good, beautiful, and true. From fake news to racist song lyrics, from profanity saturated tv shows and movies to slander and lies online, Paul’s letter sounds almost prudish, if not unimaginable.
Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (Ephesians 4:29b)
This is another example where Christ-followers can live the ultimate alternative lifestyle. When people tell inappropriate jokes, we need not repeat them. When music contains parental warnings, we can opt to listen to something else. When “everybody’s doing it,” we can choose to consume and produce the good, helpful, and encouraging.
It sounds simple, right? I can’t say I’ve heard much profanity on Sunday mornings here, but what about Monday morning? The message is not simply, “stop cussing.” Jesus said out of the heart the mouth speaks, so get to the heart of the matter. Fill your mind and heart with the good, beautiful, and true. But know growth and maturity take time.
One of the great myths of the Christian faith is you need to clean up your act in order to come to Jesus. What a lie from the pit of hell! The amazing thing about our faith is all are welcome…come as you are…but don’t stay there. Grow! We’re all on a journey. Where you are today is less important than where you’re headed…what you’re becoming…how you are growing. My twelve week-old grandson should be filling his diapers…but if he’s wearing them when he’s twelve years old, we’ve got a problem! If you’re new in your faith, of course you’re going to sin and screw up, but hopefully as you spend more time with Jesus, filled with the Holy Spirit, your head, heart, and hands will begin to change.
The book of Romans offers us a glimpse at spiritual maturity regarding the mouth.
Before Christ,
“Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.” (Romans 3:14)
Then
If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by openly declaring your faith that you are saved. (Romans 10:9-10)
A changed heart will result in changed speech…from profanity to praise, from gossip to glorifying God, from hatred to holiness, from bitterness to blessing, from…you get the idea! The Bible is filled with examples of transformation, which is why we believe people can change. We know people can change! Masterpieces can be and are being restored. Hallelujah! But as I often say, it’s not about striving, but surrender. It’s about letting the Holy Spirit fill you with good fruit and gifts. But it’s also about making good choices.
It has been said you are your friends. Choose wisely. Garbage in, garbage out. If you hang out with people who encourage and bless, chances are you’ll do the same. If you fill you mind with trashy entertainment, don’t be surprised if it leaks out of you. Jesus said,
A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. 18 A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. (Matthew 7:17-18, NLT)
The word bad used here in the original Greek referred to rotten fruit. It might not be poisonous, but it’s worthless. We need to fill our hearts and minds with Jesus, with the truth of the Bible, with the encouragement of godly friends, and with that which is good and beautiful. The overall message of verse 29 is not to have a swear jar to penalize yourself every time you say a bad word. It’s to fill your heart with good fruit, good ideas, good words, constructive messages to bless others. For more on the tongue, see James chapter three. Our words are powerful, for good or bad. Let’s re-present Jesus well with our lips.
Now that we’ve finished the first verse of today’s sermon, let’s continue!
And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. (Ephesians 4:30, NLT)
Some translations say don’t grieve the Spirit. This reminds me of the parent who said to their child, “Whatever you do is a reflection upon our family.” People are watching us…even if you don’t have a fish on the rear bumper of your car! When you surrendered your life to Jesus—if you have, and I urge you to do so if you haven’t yet—you became his. Jesus wants to be LORD, Master, not just buddy or consultant. We are Christ’s ambassadors. We’ve been called to re-present God to the world. If our words aren’t constructive, we give God a bad name.
We can grieve or glorify God by the way we live. If you have more than one child, you know that awful feeling when your kids don’t get along, fighting and arguing. You may also know the joy of seeing them get along. Imagine our Heavenly Father and what He feels when He sees how we live with one another.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. (Ephesians 4:31, NLT)
Bitterness. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die! I read an amazing story from Warren Wiersbe.
A handsome elderly man stopped at my study one day and asked me if I would perform a wedding for him. I suggested that he bring the bride in so that we might chat together and get better acquainted, since I hesitate to marry strangers. “Before she comes in,” he said, “let me explain this wedding to you. Both of us have been married before—to each other! Over thirty years ago, we got into an argument, I got mad, and we separated. Then we did a stupid thing and got a divorce. I guess we were both too proud to apologize. Well, all these years we’ve lived alone, and now we see how foolish we’ve been. Our bitterness has robbed us of the joys of life, and now we want to remarry and see if the Lord won’t give us a few years of happiness before we die.” Bitterness and anger, usually over trivial things, make havoc of homes, churches, and friendships.
Bitterness, rage, anger (which is not necessarily a sin, by the way). Paul has already spoken about our words. If our actions and words aren’t enough, he throws in “all types of evil behavior.” Stop it! How? Begin spiritual habits, simple rhythms. Join a Life Group. Read a chapter a day in the Bible (maybe start in Ephesians or John). Invite someone out for coffee to engage in a spiritual conversation. Access the free Right Now Media subscription resources. Download the YouVersion app and begin a Bible reading plan. Take one small step toward growth. If all else fails, send me an e-mail and we’ll discuss it together.
Remember, though, “spiritual formation is slow, incremental, over time, with others, and for others” (Richard Bush).
We’ve seen the negative list. Here’s a positive vision for how Christians are to behave.
Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)
What a vision! Who wants to be a part of a family like that?
Perhaps the opposite of bitterness is forgiveness, and this is a radical thing in our culture where we are prone to either cancel someone or take them to court. There may be a time and place for that, but forgiveness takes things to another level. We can’t forgive people on our own strength, but when we see how God has forgiven us, with His power we can forgive. The most famous prayer in history states, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Paul is echoing that here in verse 32. What if we don’t forgive? First, it will probably harm us more than the other person.
We all love the idea of forgiveness…until we have someone to forgive. Who do you need to forgive? They don’t deserve it. Forgiveness is never earned. It’s a choice you make to set them—and yourself—free. It doesn’t mean you trust them. It doesn’t mean everything goes back to the way it used to be, but it means you’re done with bitterness. You’re letting go.
Family, we’re always going to hurt one another. Hopefully there will never be harmful intent, but where two or more are gathered, there is bound to be conflict. If you hurt me, you want forgiveness, right? We need to be a community of faith, hope, and especially love filled with grace and forgiveness. We need to silence the lie of the enemy that wants us trapped in the pain of the past and press on toward the abundant life Jesus promised us. This is not easy. It might involve professional help. The wounds will take time to heal. But we can choose, declare, decide God will be the judge and we can forgive them because we’ve been forgiven so much by God. Let it go! For God’s sake, forgive!
Conclusion
I would love to stand in front of you each week and encourage, sharing good news. The reality is, sin is a part of each of our lives. We need to be reminded of the bad and the good, the prohibitions and the positive instructions.
Life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.
Ephesians: Finding Our True Identity
Ephesians 4:29-32
Series Big Idea: The book of Ephesians reveals our true identity…in Christ!
Big Idea: Life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
Who are you?
We’ve been going verse-by-verse through the book of Ephesians, a letter sent to a church in modern day Turkey that reveals our true identity…in Christ! Tragically, many draw their identity from their job, politics, education, net worth, sexual orientation, friends, addiction, worst mistake, or even family. Those things contribute to who we are, but our primary identity should come from being in Christ. Thirteen times in the NIV translation of Ephesians, the phrase “in Christ” is used. Paul used the idea more than 200 times in his writings. Do you know what those two words mean? One pastor wrote,
“As Christians, we live from our identity, not for our identity. We are defined by who we are in Christ, not what we do or fail to do for Christ. Christ defines who we are by who he is and what he’s done for us, in us, and through us. Understanding this information is the key to your transformation.”
We are in Christ or in idolatry…anything that takes a higher priority. I’m saying all of this as an introduction because we’re about to read some challenging words which we cannot follow, at least not on our own. We need a higher power. We need God…because life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
Don’t use foul or abusive language. (Ephesians 4:29a, NLT)
What does this really mean? The New International Version translates it this way:
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, (Ephesians 4:29a, NIV)
Foul language. Abusive language. Unwholesome talk. The entertainment industry has assembled a list of words that it deems inappropriate, at least for children. They can change a G-rated movie into a PG, PG-13, or even an R just by those words alone.
When our kids were younger, we had some good conversations about language. Why are some words acceptable and others not? Are “Christian swear words” ok? Is it really such a big deal when everyone is saying it? How did some words that even appear in the Bible become profanity?
The issue isn’t so much the articulation of one word or another. It’s about the meaning of the words. A word in one culture may have a different meaning in another. I infamously used a word in a sermon years ago with multiple meanings, one of which was unsuitable for a sermon…or any other usage! I had no idea and went on an apology tour the next week!
In college, I went on a trip to England where I used a particular word which I was told meant something quite different across the pond than it does in the USA!
The thing about language is it’s a communication tool. What are you communicating? What do you intend to communicate? What is in your heart…and will it be received that way? The verse continues…
Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (Ephesians 4:29b)
My parents used to say, “If you can’t say something nice, don’t say anything at all.” I think that’s generally good advice, and the point Paul is making to this church. Let every word that comes out of your mouth be good, helpful, and encouraging. The message isn’t simply, “Don’t cuss.” It means don’t gossip. Don’t be unnecessarily critical. Or as we used to joke in youth group, “Edify, stupid!”
That was only a joke, but that reminds me of something my dad used to tell me all the time when I got in trouble: it’s not what you said, it’s how you said it. Some researchers believe 60-70 percent of human communication is non-verbal…loudness, pitch, style, tone…to say nothing of eye contact, gestures, and body language. There’s a huge difference between a child (sweetly) saying, “I’m sorry” and (yelling) “I’m sorry!!!”
Human speech can communicate virtually any emotion, and be constructive or destructive in the process. Do you remember the old line, “Sticks and stones will break my bones but…words will never hurt me”? What a lie! Words can be devastatingly toxic…or they can transform a life for the good.
I imagine most of you can recall something said many years ago that was encouraging or destructive. Maybe it was a parent, teacher, or friend. To this day, my mom still offers encouraging words to me, while others I know never knew such positivity, struggling to even believe they are loved…by God or anyone else.
Jesus literally got to the heart of the matter in one of his famous interactions with the religious Pharisees.
You brood of vipers! How can you speak good, when you are evil? For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. (Matthew 12:34, ESV)
Let’s take a look at a bit of the context:
“A tree is identified by its fruit. If a tree is good, its fruit will be good. If a tree is bad, its fruit will be bad. 34 You brood of snakes! How could evil men like you speak what is good and right? For whatever is in your heart determines what you say. 35 A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. 36 And I tell you this, you must give an account on judgment day for every idle word you speak. 37 The words you say will either acquit you or condemn you.” (Matthew 12:33-37, NLT)
Words are powerful. They convey meaning. Communication is built through them. Yet today, it seems harder and harder to find words that are good, beautiful, and true. From fake news to racist song lyrics, from profanity saturated tv shows and movies to slander and lies online, Paul’s letter sounds almost prudish, if not unimaginable.
Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. (Ephesians 4:29b)
This is another example where Christ-followers can live the ultimate alternative lifestyle. When people tell inappropriate jokes, we need not repeat them. When music contains parental warnings, we can opt to listen to something else. When “everybody’s doing it,” we can choose to consume and produce the good, helpful, and encouraging.
It sounds simple, right? I can’t say I’ve heard much profanity on Sunday mornings here, but what about Monday morning? The message is not simply, “stop cussing.” Jesus said out of the heart the mouth speaks, so get to the heart of the matter. Fill your mind and heart with the good, beautiful, and true. But know growth and maturity take time.
One of the great myths of the Christian faith is you need to clean up your act in order to come to Jesus. What a lie from the pit of hell! The amazing thing about our faith is all are welcome…come as you are…but don’t stay there. Grow! We’re all on a journey. Where you are today is less important than where you’re headed…what you’re becoming…how you are growing. My twelve week-old grandson should be filling his diapers…but if he’s wearing them when he’s twelve years old, we’ve got a problem! If you’re new in your faith, of course you’re going to sin and screw up, but hopefully as you spend more time with Jesus, filled with the Holy Spirit, your head, heart, and hands will begin to change.
The book of Romans offers us a glimpse at spiritual maturity regarding the mouth.
Before Christ,
“Their mouths are full of cursing and bitterness.” (Romans 3:14)
Then
If you openly declare that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead, you will be saved. 10 For it is by believing in your heart that you are made right with God, and it is by openly declaring your faith that you are saved. (Romans 10:9-10)
A changed heart will result in changed speech…from profanity to praise, from gossip to glorifying God, from hatred to holiness, from bitterness to blessing, from…you get the idea! The Bible is filled with examples of transformation, which is why we believe people can change. We know people can change! Masterpieces can be and are being restored. Hallelujah! But as I often say, it’s not about striving, but surrender. It’s about letting the Holy Spirit fill you with good fruit and gifts. But it’s also about making good choices.
It has been said you are your friends. Choose wisely. Garbage in, garbage out. If you hang out with people who encourage and bless, chances are you’ll do the same. If you fill you mind with trashy entertainment, don’t be surprised if it leaks out of you. Jesus said,
A good tree produces good fruit, and a bad tree produces bad fruit. 18 A good tree can’t produce bad fruit, and a bad tree can’t produce good fruit. (Matthew 7:17-18, NLT)
The word bad used here in the original Greek referred to rotten fruit. It might not be poisonous, but it’s worthless. We need to fill our hearts and minds with Jesus, with the truth of the Bible, with the encouragement of godly friends, and with that which is good and beautiful. The overall message of verse 29 is not to have a swear jar to penalize yourself every time you say a bad word. It’s to fill your heart with good fruit, good ideas, good words, constructive messages to bless others. For more on the tongue, see James chapter three. Our words are powerful, for good or bad. Let’s re-present Jesus well with our lips.
Now that we’ve finished the first verse of today’s sermon, let’s continue!
And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. (Ephesians 4:30, NLT)
Some translations say don’t grieve the Spirit. This reminds me of the parent who said to their child, “Whatever you do is a reflection upon our family.” People are watching us…even if you don’t have a fish on the rear bumper of your car! When you surrendered your life to Jesus—if you have, and I urge you to do so if you haven’t yet—you became his. Jesus wants to be LORD, Master, not just buddy or consultant. We are Christ’s ambassadors. We’ve been called to re-present God to the world. If our words aren’t constructive, we give God a bad name.
We can grieve or glorify God by the way we live. If you have more than one child, you know that awful feeling when your kids don’t get along, fighting and arguing. You may also know the joy of seeing them get along. Imagine our Heavenly Father and what He feels when He sees how we live with one another.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of evil behavior. (Ephesians 4:31, NLT)
Bitterness. It’s like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die! I read an amazing story from Warren Wiersbe.
A handsome elderly man stopped at my study one day and asked me if I would perform a wedding for him. I suggested that he bring the bride in so that we might chat together and get better acquainted, since I hesitate to marry strangers. “Before she comes in,” he said, “let me explain this wedding to you. Both of us have been married before—to each other! Over thirty years ago, we got into an argument, I got mad, and we separated. Then we did a stupid thing and got a divorce. I guess we were both too proud to apologize. Well, all these years we’ve lived alone, and now we see how foolish we’ve been. Our bitterness has robbed us of the joys of life, and now we want to remarry and see if the Lord won’t give us a few years of happiness before we die.” Bitterness and anger, usually over trivial things, make havoc of homes, churches, and friendships.
Bitterness, rage, anger (which is not necessarily a sin, by the way). Paul has already spoken about our words. If our actions and words aren’t enough, he throws in “all types of evil behavior.” Stop it! How? Begin spiritual habits, simple rhythms. Join a Life Group. Read a chapter a day in the Bible (maybe start in Ephesians or John). Invite someone out for coffee to engage in a spiritual conversation. Access the free Right Now Media subscription resources. Download the YouVersion app and begin a Bible reading plan. Take one small step toward growth. If all else fails, send me an e-mail and we’ll discuss it together.
Remember, though, “spiritual formation is slow, incremental, over time, with others, and for others” (Richard Bush).
We’ve seen the negative list. Here’s a positive vision for how Christians are to behave.
Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you. (Ephesians 4:32, NLT)
What a vision! Who wants to be a part of a family like that?
Perhaps the opposite of bitterness is forgiveness, and this is a radical thing in our culture where we are prone to either cancel someone or take them to court. There may be a time and place for that, but forgiveness takes things to another level. We can’t forgive people on our own strength, but when we see how God has forgiven us, with His power we can forgive. The most famous prayer in history states, “Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.” Paul is echoing that here in verse 32. What if we don’t forgive? First, it will probably harm us more than the other person.
We all love the idea of forgiveness…until we have someone to forgive. Who do you need to forgive? They don’t deserve it. Forgiveness is never earned. It’s a choice you make to set them—and yourself—free. It doesn’t mean you trust them. It doesn’t mean everything goes back to the way it used to be, but it means you’re done with bitterness. You’re letting go.
Family, we’re always going to hurt one another. Hopefully there will never be harmful intent, but where two or more are gathered, there is bound to be conflict. If you hurt me, you want forgiveness, right? We need to be a community of faith, hope, and especially love filled with grace and forgiveness. We need to silence the lie of the enemy that wants us trapped in the pain of the past and press on toward the abundant life Jesus promised us. This is not easy. It might involve professional help. The wounds will take time to heal. But we can choose, declare, decide God will be the judge and we can forgive them because we’ve been forgiven so much by God. Let it go! For God’s sake, forgive!
Conclusion
I would love to stand in front of you each week and encourage, sharing good news. The reality is, sin is a part of each of our lives. We need to be reminded of the bad and the good, the prohibitions and the positive instructions.
Life in the Kingdom of God is radically different than in the world around us.
You can listen to this message and others at the First Alliance Church podcast here.
You can watch this video and others at the First Alliance Church Video Library here.