We Are Forgiven, 16 March 2014
Big Idea: We are forgiven.
Ephesians 4:25-32
The prohibitions from last week continue.
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. (4:25)
What’s therefore there for? Paul said we are made new, no longer children of Adam, but the new Adam, Jesus Christ. He is our Savior, Sanctified, Healer, and Coming King. He is our big brother, a perfect example for us to follow.
Paul says first not to lie. Speak the truth. Nothing destroys trust like lying. Nothing destroys unity like distrust.
This might sound obvious. Don’t lie. It’s one of the Ten Commandments. Everyone knows it’s wrong. How many do it, though?
Years ago a friend told me how he lied to his daughter. I was shocked! “How could you lie to your sweet child?” I thought. My friend said, “I told her I would play a game with her. I got busy, she went to bed, and I did not do what I said and, therefore, lied. I have since apologized.”
Wow! I challenged him on his assessment and he said sin is like layers of an onion. Just when we think we are righteous, we sin in our pride and have to repent of our godlessness.
I find I’m most prone to lie in what has been called the final 10%. Perhaps you are asked to recount a story and you share most of it, but there’s a little bit missing. Maybe you are asked to share your feelings and you reveal the majority of it, but you skip one or two details.
Brothers and sisters, we are all members of one body, and for the body to be healthy it must work together, it must speak the truth in love—even when it is difficult.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (4:26-27)
Notice this does not say do not get angry. Not all anger is sin. Jesus got angry. Don’t sin in anger. Resolve disputes. Don’t hold a grudge which would give the devil a foothold. God is angry with the wicked. He hates sin. He hates injustice. How do you deal with anger? Do you bottle it up? Ignore it? Express it violently? Rage on Facebook? Pray about it?
He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. (4:28)
Here’s another one of God’s Top Ten. Don’t steal. Further, if you want something, work. Notice the ending. Share. Don’t hoard. Be generous. Generosity is one of the most compelling signs of a child of the King of Kings who owns it all. We are to work, earn and share. Many are unable to do so and need our help. That’s what family does. Family helps family.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (4:29)
Oh dang! Oops! Keep your talk pure. The Bible is filled with instructions regarding our speech. Why? Out of the heart the mouth speaks.
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. (Luke 6:45)
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. (Proverbs 4:23-24)
This includes profanity, dirty jokes, sharp sarcasm (“anger in a clown suit”), and gossip (also known as confessing the sins of others!).
Words are very powerful. That line about sticks and stones is a big lie. Words have the power to kill and destroy, yet they can also encourage, edify, and bless.
And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. (4:30)
What does this mean? The day of redemption is when the Holy Spirit presents us to Jesus. What grieves God? Sin. We can grieve God but we are sealed. We are forgiven, but that doesn’t give us a license to sin. God’s forgiveness does not negate human consequences of our words and actions.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (4:31-32)
Paul really lays it on here. Look at the list of prohibitions:
bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, malice
This is a common sequence. We are wronged and become bitter. Over time, the bitterness in our heart can grow into rage, anger, and outward actions of brawling, slander, and malice. This is not always the process, but Paul offers a compelling—if not radical—alternative. He says to be kind, compassionate, and forgiving. Easy for him to say, right?! He’s probably writing from a mountaintop cottage overlooking the ocean, living the high life as an early Christian celebrity, surrounded by assistants and caretakers. Except that he’s writing from prison!
Why forgive?
…forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (4:32b)
We forgive because we’ve been forgiven. Paul understood this. He was forgiven for persecuting the church, including his support of the stoning of Stephen in Acts 7 (Acts 8:1). Perhaps you have skeletons in your closet, but killing Christians is unlikely among them. Even if it were, you have been forgiven. We don’t deserve it. Nobody deserves to be forgiven—by definition.
We’ve all been wronged and we have two possible responses: bitterness and forgiveness. We know intellectually that bitterness only harms us—and Paul forbids it— but it’s so attractive. It’s easy to hold grudges, judge another, blame others, and hold their offenses against them. Forgiveness is obviously a superior response, but it can be so difficult. Perhaps part of the challenge is in our misunderstanding of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is…
canceling a debt owed to you
removing the control your offender has over you
giving a gift to your offender…and yourself
leaving ultimate justice in God’s hands
often an ongoing process
wanting good for your offender
forsaking revenge
moving forward
dropping resentment and grudge
a choice, a decision (not an emotion)
a step toward healing
an opportunity to display grace
An ancient Chinese proverbs says, “He who seeks revenge should dig two graves.”
Forgiveness is not…
denying the sin occurred or diminishing its evil
instant emotional healing
enabling sin
necessarily a response to a repentant apology
covering up sin committed against us
removing the consequences of the offense (legal action may even be required)
trust (forgiveness takes a moment; trust takes time to build and longer to rebuild)
reconciliation (it takes one to forgive and two to reconcile)
forgetting
My Story
I was apprehensive about preaching this message. It seems often when I speak on a subject, God gives me real-life experiences that correspond. This is why I love to preach on success, freedom, and prosperity and I’m sometimes nervous about speaking on trials! I had a sense that this week I would need to forgive someone and I actually imagined a scenario in which I would be in a car accident and need to forgive someone.
I was in a car accident this past week! Fortunately, it was relatively minor. During Wednesday’s snow storm I was stopped at a red light and a car slid into mine. There were no bodily injuries and just some dents in the vehicles. I thanked God all morning that I didn’t have to forgive someone more reckless and ruthless.
Story
On May 20, 2012, 18 year-old Takunda Mavima was driving home from a party when he lost control and crashed his car into an off-ramp near Grand Rapids, Michigan. Riding in the car were 17 year-old, Tim See, and 15 year-old, Krysta Howell. Both were killed in the accident.
Takunda Mavima lived.
Mavima pleaded guilty to all charges and was sentenced to between 30 months and 15 years in prison.
Despite their unimaginable grief and anger, both the sister and the father of victim, Tim See, gave a moving address to the court on behalf of Mavima, urging the judge to give him a light sentence.
“I am begging you to let Takunda Mavima make something of himself in the real world — don’t send him to prison and get hard and bitter, that boy has learned his lesson a thousand times over and he’ll never make the same mistake again.”
And when the hearing ended, the victim’s family made their way across the courtroom to embrace, console, and publicly forgive Mavima.
Make sure this image sticks with you forever.
There will be a time in your life when someone will wrong you. God forbid they take the life of your child. But it will happen. And what matters most isn’t how it happened, but how you respond to it.
And if you’re a person of faith, the calling is even greater. The gospel of forgiveness isn’t a high calling for the heroic individual, or a counter-cultural description of heavenly perfection. It is a principle central to the gospel itself – the very heart of our faith in which we are called to embody.
In the swelling sea of human destruction, the little story of Takunda Mavima and a family from Michigan is a lighthouse on a hill, a beacon of hope, guiding the way for all our ships to pass through.
Right now, how can you prepare yourself with a clear plan of action to forgive in the darkest of times? (from Storyline Blog, March 8, 2013)
We are forgiven by God who gives us the power to forgive.
Who do you need to forgive?
Credits:
Some ideas from
J.I. Packer, Ephesians (sermon series audio)
Mark Driscoll, Who Do You Think You Are (book and podcast series)
GLO Bible
Louie Giglio, Passion City Church sermon series
J. Vernon McGee, Thru The Bible, http://thruthebible.ca
You can listen to this message and others at the Scio podcast here. You can also subscribe to our podcast here.
Ephesians 4:25-32
The prohibitions from last week continue.
Therefore each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to his neighbor, for we are all members of one body. (4:25)
What’s therefore there for? Paul said we are made new, no longer children of Adam, but the new Adam, Jesus Christ. He is our Savior, Sanctified, Healer, and Coming King. He is our big brother, a perfect example for us to follow.
Paul says first not to lie. Speak the truth. Nothing destroys trust like lying. Nothing destroys unity like distrust.
This might sound obvious. Don’t lie. It’s one of the Ten Commandments. Everyone knows it’s wrong. How many do it, though?
Years ago a friend told me how he lied to his daughter. I was shocked! “How could you lie to your sweet child?” I thought. My friend said, “I told her I would play a game with her. I got busy, she went to bed, and I did not do what I said and, therefore, lied. I have since apologized.”
Wow! I challenged him on his assessment and he said sin is like layers of an onion. Just when we think we are righteous, we sin in our pride and have to repent of our godlessness.
I find I’m most prone to lie in what has been called the final 10%. Perhaps you are asked to recount a story and you share most of it, but there’s a little bit missing. Maybe you are asked to share your feelings and you reveal the majority of it, but you skip one or two details.
Brothers and sisters, we are all members of one body, and for the body to be healthy it must work together, it must speak the truth in love—even when it is difficult.
“In your anger do not sin”: Do not let the sun go down while you are still angry, and do not give the devil a foothold. (4:26-27)
Notice this does not say do not get angry. Not all anger is sin. Jesus got angry. Don’t sin in anger. Resolve disputes. Don’t hold a grudge which would give the devil a foothold. God is angry with the wicked. He hates sin. He hates injustice. How do you deal with anger? Do you bottle it up? Ignore it? Express it violently? Rage on Facebook? Pray about it?
He who has been stealing must steal no longer, but must work, doing something useful with his own hands, that he may have something to share with those in need. (4:28)
Here’s another one of God’s Top Ten. Don’t steal. Further, if you want something, work. Notice the ending. Share. Don’t hoard. Be generous. Generosity is one of the most compelling signs of a child of the King of Kings who owns it all. We are to work, earn and share. Many are unable to do so and need our help. That’s what family does. Family helps family.
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (4:29)
Oh dang! Oops! Keep your talk pure. The Bible is filled with instructions regarding our speech. Why? Out of the heart the mouth speaks.
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks. (Luke 6:45)
Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. (Proverbs 4:23-24)
This includes profanity, dirty jokes, sharp sarcasm (“anger in a clown suit”), and gossip (also known as confessing the sins of others!).
Words are very powerful. That line about sticks and stones is a big lie. Words have the power to kill and destroy, yet they can also encourage, edify, and bless.
And do not grieve the Holy Spirit of God, with whom you were sealed for the day of redemption. (4:30)
What does this mean? The day of redemption is when the Holy Spirit presents us to Jesus. What grieves God? Sin. We can grieve God but we are sealed. We are forgiven, but that doesn’t give us a license to sin. God’s forgiveness does not negate human consequences of our words and actions.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (4:31-32)
Paul really lays it on here. Look at the list of prohibitions:
bitterness, rage, anger, brawling, slander, malice
This is a common sequence. We are wronged and become bitter. Over time, the bitterness in our heart can grow into rage, anger, and outward actions of brawling, slander, and malice. This is not always the process, but Paul offers a compelling—if not radical—alternative. He says to be kind, compassionate, and forgiving. Easy for him to say, right?! He’s probably writing from a mountaintop cottage overlooking the ocean, living the high life as an early Christian celebrity, surrounded by assistants and caretakers. Except that he’s writing from prison!
Why forgive?
…forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. (4:32b)
We forgive because we’ve been forgiven. Paul understood this. He was forgiven for persecuting the church, including his support of the stoning of Stephen in Acts 7 (Acts 8:1). Perhaps you have skeletons in your closet, but killing Christians is unlikely among them. Even if it were, you have been forgiven. We don’t deserve it. Nobody deserves to be forgiven—by definition.
We’ve all been wronged and we have two possible responses: bitterness and forgiveness. We know intellectually that bitterness only harms us—and Paul forbids it— but it’s so attractive. It’s easy to hold grudges, judge another, blame others, and hold their offenses against them. Forgiveness is obviously a superior response, but it can be so difficult. Perhaps part of the challenge is in our misunderstanding of forgiveness.
Forgiveness is…
canceling a debt owed to you
removing the control your offender has over you
giving a gift to your offender…and yourself
leaving ultimate justice in God’s hands
often an ongoing process
wanting good for your offender
forsaking revenge
moving forward
dropping resentment and grudge
a choice, a decision (not an emotion)
a step toward healing
an opportunity to display grace
An ancient Chinese proverbs says, “He who seeks revenge should dig two graves.”
Forgiveness is not…
denying the sin occurred or diminishing its evil
instant emotional healing
enabling sin
necessarily a response to a repentant apology
covering up sin committed against us
removing the consequences of the offense (legal action may even be required)
trust (forgiveness takes a moment; trust takes time to build and longer to rebuild)
reconciliation (it takes one to forgive and two to reconcile)
forgetting
My Story
I was apprehensive about preaching this message. It seems often when I speak on a subject, God gives me real-life experiences that correspond. This is why I love to preach on success, freedom, and prosperity and I’m sometimes nervous about speaking on trials! I had a sense that this week I would need to forgive someone and I actually imagined a scenario in which I would be in a car accident and need to forgive someone.
I was in a car accident this past week! Fortunately, it was relatively minor. During Wednesday’s snow storm I was stopped at a red light and a car slid into mine. There were no bodily injuries and just some dents in the vehicles. I thanked God all morning that I didn’t have to forgive someone more reckless and ruthless.
Story
On May 20, 2012, 18 year-old Takunda Mavima was driving home from a party when he lost control and crashed his car into an off-ramp near Grand Rapids, Michigan. Riding in the car were 17 year-old, Tim See, and 15 year-old, Krysta Howell. Both were killed in the accident.
Takunda Mavima lived.
Mavima pleaded guilty to all charges and was sentenced to between 30 months and 15 years in prison.
Despite their unimaginable grief and anger, both the sister and the father of victim, Tim See, gave a moving address to the court on behalf of Mavima, urging the judge to give him a light sentence.
“I am begging you to let Takunda Mavima make something of himself in the real world — don’t send him to prison and get hard and bitter, that boy has learned his lesson a thousand times over and he’ll never make the same mistake again.”
And when the hearing ended, the victim’s family made their way across the courtroom to embrace, console, and publicly forgive Mavima.
Make sure this image sticks with you forever.
There will be a time in your life when someone will wrong you. God forbid they take the life of your child. But it will happen. And what matters most isn’t how it happened, but how you respond to it.
And if you’re a person of faith, the calling is even greater. The gospel of forgiveness isn’t a high calling for the heroic individual, or a counter-cultural description of heavenly perfection. It is a principle central to the gospel itself – the very heart of our faith in which we are called to embody.
In the swelling sea of human destruction, the little story of Takunda Mavima and a family from Michigan is a lighthouse on a hill, a beacon of hope, guiding the way for all our ships to pass through.
Right now, how can you prepare yourself with a clear plan of action to forgive in the darkest of times? (from Storyline Blog, March 8, 2013)
We are forgiven by God who gives us the power to forgive.
Who do you need to forgive?
Credits:
Some ideas from
J.I. Packer, Ephesians (sermon series audio)
Mark Driscoll, Who Do You Think You Are (book and podcast series)
GLO Bible
Louie Giglio, Passion City Church sermon series
J. Vernon McGee, Thru The Bible, http://thruthebible.ca
You can listen to this message and others at the Scio podcast here. You can also subscribe to our podcast here.